So Annoyed

[Happy Momma]

I am so annoyed with my in-laws right now.

We live about 3 hours away from my in-laws.  This week we were in the town they live in.  My parents also live there and we always stay at my parents house when we visit because they have room for us.  But we always make plans to visit my in-laws while we are there too.  So, we had plans to go over to their house.  I get a last email from my MIL saying that they have to go car shopping so we can't come over.  She said they have busy lives and schedules to follow too.  My MIL is a housewife and my FIL is retired.  So, I'm pretty sure this car shopping trip (in the rain, by the way) could have waited until the next day.

The reason it irritates me so much is because of my daughter.  She will be 2 in a few weeks and hardly even knows my in-laws.  It just hurts me that they don't seem to care to be a part of her life.   

Just had to vent. 

[Mom2ConnorRyan]

Im sorry to hear that.  I have the same problem except it is with my parents.  I always want my son to get to know them more but everytime we go over or schedule something they are gone or have to go do something.  My mom is still upset because my son was born a boy (he is 2 years old) and she still saids to this day when am I going to have her a granddaughter.  I told when she starts spending time with the grandson she already has.  I have stop trying because I am tired of trying and really does my son need to be around someone that constantly wishes he was a girl? I think not.  Good luck!

[MichelleB]

yea that car shopping trip could have been postponed that kind of sucks

[Happy Momma]

I'm not sure yet what will end up happening- but next weekend we are traveling to where our parents live to celebrate my daughter's 2nd bday.  We are having the party at a park so it will be convienent for all to go to.  We are only inviting family- so far my side of the family has said they are coming.  No one from my hubby's side has responded.  Except for his mom- to say she doesn't know, it will depend on how she feels.  She does have some health problems related to her diabetes but I would certainly think she could make it to the park for an hour to celebrate my daughter's bday.  We live three hours away and we are doing it there to make it easier for our family.  Anyways, I'm already annoyed knowing that they probably won't come.

[Nancy]

Although my children are grown...I can relate as I too tried to have a relationship with my side of the family when my children were growing up.  I gave up trying to do it on their schedule.  The only one who ever cared about my kids and did make an effort were my parents and my sister...my brothers  never did.  I have 13 neices and nephews who all received birthday cards from me..my kids never received one from any of them.  They do not know my side of the family and don't care.  My husbands side is another story, and to tell the truth they don't have much to do with them either. 

I had a therapist tell me once that children need to know that they have an extended family, but not necessarily need to know them.  To make the surroundings they are in secure with love and understanding.  If others want to share, let them.  If not, don't push it on the kids or the ones who don't care.  And by others she meant not necessarily family members.

[Happy Momma]

That's great advice Nancy.  Thank you!

[Audrey]

Nancy,

The advice is excellent. My kids are very close to my side of the family. They are not close at all to their dads family. It's their choice.

My kids are older. They both have cell phones. They both have email accounts. His family just doesn't stay in touch with my kids.

On the flip side, my sister and niece call here at least once a week. My brother talks to both of my girls on AIM at least once or twice a week.

My mom calls one of us daily.

My family really makes an effort to have a relationship with my kids.

[Judy]

I had the same problem as well. My girl is 3 this year. There were few occasions when she was hospitalized for bronchitis. My in-law hardly make any efforts to visit her. I was very disappointed at that time. But things started to turn better now. I've learned to forgive my mother-in-law, not because that she turned nice , but because it takes a lot of energy to dislike a person. I have better use of such energy for my kids!

[Aimee]

I have too many problems with my inlaws, I'd take up so many posts here. LOL  I should jsut blog about it...soon, yes, soon.